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Friday, April 27, 2007

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

I've decided (a la J Dawg 69 aka Lucious Lips aka IHOP) that I'm a MUCH better live poker player than online player.

Tonizzle, for instance I played two NLHE tourneys. Top 3 paid.

The first tourney I finished fourth after being short stack three hands in...(don't axe).

The second tourney I finished...first (KTo beat A3o when a ten hit the flop).

Profit pour moi? $40 for 3.25 hours or so of work.

I have needs here people, and not just sexual ones.

I need to read the board, people's reaction to the board, tha pizzeeps reaction to a raise or re-raise, peeps reaction when I scoop a mongo pot my way and they sit there in silence while cursing the day they raised with 3rd pair/bad kicker.

Online, I'm ok. I'm pretty much a break-even player.

Live? I'm a freakin' T-Rex, and everyone else is an unknowing chicken.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Presto Is Gold...Part 1

*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Bloody P [5s 5c] (PRESTO!)
#1 CrapBag: folds
mdperl348: calls 20
PSchrader: folds
filthflarn: folds
jrfans360: folds
Bloody P: raises 100 to 120
mdperl348: calls 100
*** FLOP *** [5h Jc 2s]
Bloody P: bets 40 (like Kylie Minogue says, "you just keep me hangin' on")
mdperl348: calls 40
*** TURN *** [5h Jc 2s] [2c]
Bloody P: checks (bet inducing check with a full house)
mdperl348: bets 60
Bloody P: calls 60
*** RIVER *** [5h Jc 2s 2c] [4h]
Bloody P: bets 200
mdperl348: calls 200 (um...A2? A4?)
*** SHOW DOWN ***
Bloody P: shows [5s 5c] (a full house, Fives full of Deuces)
mdperl348: mucks hand
Bloody P collected 850 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 850 | Rake 0
Board [5h Jc 2s 2c 4h]
Seat 1: jrfans360 (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: Bloody P (big blind) showed [5s 5c] and won (850) with a full house, Fives full of Deuces
Seat 3: #1 CrapBag folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 4: mdperl348 mucked [Js Th]
Seat 5: PSchrader folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: filthflarn (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Another New Blog

A buddy and I have started a new blog that is about absolutely nothing.

Click the picture here, or the picture below to check it out.

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Egotastic!

So...

As most of you know, I'm busto on Full Tilt (send any donations to "Bloody P"...I'm $0.40 shy of playing in Kat's Friday tourney).

I was afraid it was going to happen on Poker Stars as well.

I had a meager 'roll of about $110. I managed to dronk that off to about $50 the other night. Needless to say, I was afraid of going busto on Stars, as well.

Then it hit me.

I axed myself, "Oh, Bloody one, why art thou handing thyself thine own anus?"

And verily, I say unto you beetches (as I done saith to my badself the other night): It was all EGO.

No, not EGGO. Not leggo my freaking eggo. I'm not Waffles, for the love of Darryl Hall and John Oates.

Ego. That thing inside of you that tells you you're better than the people you're playing against, and you can't believe that they'd call your pre-flop raise (with A7 s00000ted) with AK, because, hell, you've been a total tight-ass, rock tonight!

The nerve!

Ego was kicking my ass, and I had to let it go.

To update, I'm back up to the $90 range after playing some SnGs on 'Stars. And I'm up because I listened to a certain mister Kenny Rogers, who knew what the fuck he was talking about:

1. You got know when to hold 'em.
B. Know when to fold 'em.
3. Know when to walk away.
E. Know when to run.

Seriously sage advice. I played four 6-handed $6.60 SnGs tonight and here's how I finished:

1
2
4
2

Why? I was ego free. Also see A-6 above.

Last night, here's how I finished:

6
4
2
4

Why? Because I was the best player at the table and I can't believe my ducks didn't hold up against AQs!!

Anyway, you know what this muther father did to win tonight?

I put my damn ego aside and played some cards.

Know when you're beat, know when you're ahead, people, that's the key.

________________________________________

Oh, on a personal note, I accidentally cut the crap out of my dick with a pair of electric hair cutting shears today when I was doing some "manscaping".

Lying on the bathroom floor was tons of hair and crazy blood everywhere. Seriously, blood shooting from my dink. I was almost afraid I'd cut something vital off.

I can barely move even now without excruciating pain.

True story.

Friday, April 13, 2007

On Racism

If I hear one more story about Imus and Rutgers, I swear to God I'm going to throw up my dew rag.

Fo shizzle.

Saturday, April 07, 2007

So Close


Yet so far away...

Sunday, April 01, 2007

My New Blog

I'm putting my best foot forward into my former life of baseball blogging.

Many moons ago, I wrote a fairly popular Twins blog with a buddy of mine called "The Baseball Boys". Our site even got written up in Minneapolis Star Tribune with some other Twins bloggers.

Now, I am going to attempt to tackle a whole new beast: The Milwaukee Brewers.

Yes, I'm a Twins fan first, but since I'm back in the land of cheese and beer, and the Brew Crew have always been dear to my heart, I have started up a snarky Brewers blog called:


World Series Free Since 1982

Go ahead, I dare you to click.