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Saturday, December 30, 2006

More SnG Stuff

Been actually enjoying myself playing SnGs on Stars and Full Tilt. It's been a refreshing change from the grind that can become cash games. For awhile, cash games made me feel like a 46 year old, massively overweight stripper with C-section scars giving out lapdances for free, hoping for someone to throw a dollar her way when she got on stage for her routine.

Anyway...I've been playing the $5 full-ring SnGs on Stars and the $2 6-handed SnGs on Full Tilt exclusively and have been running well in both.

My strategy has been very simple: just read the "Sit and Go" section of Phil Gordon's Little Blue Book, and you'll have all you need. Seriously. That's about it.

Of course, I have my own moves (finish with a swirl), but I usually just start tight, loosen up, steal the blinds when they start to creep up, pick my spots to make a move, and get aggressive at the end.

If you start out playing squeaky tight, most of the donkeys will go to war with each other trying to see who's cock is bigger, and will end up leaving you in a nice position and medium sized chip stack to steal blinds and bluff with raises and re-raises.

Most nights, I usually start with the Stars $5 games and if things aren't going as well as expected, I switch to the $2 SnGs to avoid tilting off the bankroll I've grown at Stars ($30-$140 in a week and a half). It's proved to be a pretty good policy: I'm only putting down $2 on Full Tilt, the games are fishy, and I usually make the money...even if it is only a couple of bucks. This helps give me a little confident boost to go back and attack the Stars $5 games and play well.

Last night, I donked out of a Stars SnG and fired up FT. I'd had some beers, so I figured I was safer playing $2 than $5 SnGs (stupid beer...the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems).

I played four $2 SnGs and finished: 2-1-4-2

The two second place finishes were fairly amazing comebacks; both times I was almost felted, but came back to take the chip lead. When I got my money in at the end of both of them, I was ahead, but was unlucky.

Oh well, like with the ladies, it's the chase that makes it exciting.

Monday, December 25, 2006

Two Great Tastes That Go Great Together








































Here's a nice gift my wife got me for Christmas. May I present the Royal Flush Franchise Cap?

Thought I'd put this up in case Speaker or Drizz wanted one of their own. They come in all flavors.

Merry Christmas!!

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Mele Kaliki Maka


Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good weekend at the tables.



I hope Santa brings you pots that are fat and juicy like mine!!! LOLOL!!

EDIT:

My pots ARE fat and juicy tonight! I've played two SnG's tonight. My results?? See below:















AND















I've much more than made back the $16.50 I dronked off last night.

Happy Kwanzaa, bitches!

EDIT OF EDIT:

The Christmas cheer just keep on coming. Put the kids down for a nap, fired up Stars and gave myself another nice little present:




















Monday, December 18, 2006

SnG's, Hippies and Me

What a night...

Played five $5 SnGs on PokerStars.

Here's how I finished:

9
6
4
5
1

So, for the night, I'm down $5.00.

I would call that a win after the terrible beats in the first and fourth I took, but I'm not going to bitch about it here.

Life is good, babies. Enjoy it.

Not to get all hippy on you all, but love your family; enjoy what you have; realize what you want you probably don't need; and take joy in the things that you're good at or love.

I've had a sort of spiritual/emotional/metaphysical awakening this past weekend.

Life is good, and precious, yo. And although I'm probably a hypocrite for saying 'live it to the fullest, we're here for too short a time' (I just spent 3 hours playing poker)...it's true.

Look at your wife, girlfriend, friend, relative, dog, poker blogger, favorite chair and say, "Hey. I'm glad you're a part of my life. It wouldn't be the same without you here."

And don't forget to min-raise your aces.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Salut

Gracie's right. I've read a billion "goodbye" blogs, and they're all bullshit. All of them.

Even Daddy, who I consider my Miss Cleo soulmate blogger (never met the man) based on the vulgarity that he spews in print, (that I wouldn't ever write, but instead, just choose to verbalize to the people around me) quit his blog, but eventually came back to fill our worlds with sweet, wonderful perversion.

The past few days, I've seriously been on the worst poker run since I've started playing. I had taken my Full Tilt account from $10 to almost $200 playing micro stakes cash games in about 2 months. I was on fire. I was happy, cocky, and true like an Albanian soldier.

Hell, I took about $80 off of bloggers in cash games in three .10/.25 sessions. I was completely at home.

Then it all went to hell. I couldn't win. Against the worst sort of donkeys. Smack talking-bet the pot with third pair (and hit a set)-I have a double gut shot straight draw (and get there)-donkeys. I seemed to have the second nuts every hand I took to showdown. And we're talking micro....CAPPED. I was on tilt for about 3 days straight.

Thus, my previous post.

I currently stand at roughly $60 in my Full Tilt account. That's a kick to the junk, with another foot seemingly heading straight for the taint.

After my "Au Revoir" post, I did a lot of thinking (thanks to all of you who commented, it sincerely meant a lot)

I thought about poker, about blogging, about everything.

Here's what I came up with:

Poker

I consider myself a cash game player. A good, micro cash game player... for the time being. How else could I take my FT account up so high in so little time playing .10/.25? Yes, I r00l. Or whatever.

After losing my brown star to the likes of Arnie from "What's Eating Gilbert Grape", I started to think about my poker strengths. What I started with, how I got to cash games, etc.

It's no secret that I'm a terrible MTT player. I don't have the patience for it. I go on tilt just thinking about sitting in front of this stupid laptop for 3 hours, just for the opportunity to bubble. Which brings me to...

Where did I start? Before I started playing cash games?

SnG's. Straight up $5+.50 SnGs on HoldemPoker.com. And I kicked ass. Much ass, motherfuckers. I built my bankroll playing SnGs.

Do you see where this is going??

Yes. I'm playing $5 SnGs again. On Stars (and one of FT). So far, I've only played four, but have finished 2-1-2-1.

Not. Too. Shabby.

My confidence is sort of coming back, and I'm playing sound, TAG poker. And winning. Or, at least getting in the money. I've been re-reading Harrington, and tonight I went through Phil Gordon's SnG strategy in The Little Blue Book. It's helped. Plus, he's so tall and dreamy...

I'm sure I'll go back to cash games eventually, but I think taking a break and getting out of my comfort zone by playing SnGs and the occasional (profitable) MTT may help my total game overall.

Blogging

I'm not going to end this blog. I'm far too narcissistic to just let this blog go. I bought the rights to "www.bloodyp.com", for chrissakes.

If I didn't blog about poker and my life, I'd blog about my farts and my cock. It doesn't matter. I just like to talk. Whether I get comments or not (I'm a whore for comments). By the way, I have logged over 30,000 hits since this blog started. Awesome, eh?

I thought I was some sort of blog god until I realized that some messed up perverts were searching for the word "gash" on Google.

Anyway, this is all sort of the same reason I'd never kill myself:

I love me too much.

Everything

SoCo and Diet Coke is a killer combination. Not as good as Beam and Diet, but close.

Closed caption to RackPirate: got your email. You rule. Response coming soon. Thanks for the 'chin-up'.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Au Revoir

I'm done.

I think I'm done with online poker. I'm on the worst losing streak I've ever had. Ever.

I think I'm done with this blog. It doesn't seem like anyone reads this thing anymore anyway.

I'm so angry/tilted/whatever that I could give two shits about ever playing/blogging again.

Monday, December 11, 2006

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

















It really doesn't get much better than this, yo.

Wait....

Yes, it does:

















If you want to avoid the beating of your life, don't mess with Bing. He'll come back from the grave and pummel the shit out of you.

Merry Christmas Bing, you silk-voiced bad-ass.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Weekend and Gambling

I took a shot on the (fudge) Pack to beat the 49'ers at home, and it paid off. Being a Vikings fan, you have no idea how hard it was for me to root for the Packers...

I almost took a shot on the Saints to beat Dallas in Dallas, but pussed out. STUPID BRAIN.

Watched two episodes of The Family Guy tonight. It is hands down the funniest show on television (e.g. "Stone Phillips is a guy you hate until he's inside of you.").

Poker was a little better than break-even tonight. I got way ahead for awhile, gave most of it back, and then eke'd out about a $5.00 profit. At my levels, that's pretty damn good.

To all of you in Vegas right now: I wish I could've been there, but my 3 year old's pre-school Christmas concert was probably as entertaining as a 3 night stay in Vegas.

Also, I found this on T-Shirt Hell.









Click to enlarge, word.


Holla.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Gotta Get Up To Get Down, Gotta Gotta Get Up...

I'm finally crawling out of my evil-robot-chubby bad swing. For awhile, the hits were coming faster than Mike Tyson before all the rape charges/facial tattoos/ear biting/having sex with Waffles/etc.

BadBlood posted something to the effect that he was constantly getting drawn out on, and that's exactly what was happening to me. Every draw was hitting against me. Every. Single. One. Set over set, top two pair is no goot against a rivered flush (or straight). And this is with pot sized bets along the way. Pot odds are thrown out the window at my limits, it seems.

It was seriously making me want to eat keno crayons to build my bankroll back up. I would've eaten four for $200 a couple of days ago.

Things are getting better. Thankfully.

I've also decided that I'm not playing MTT's or SnG's anymore. Ever. Well, if it's a charity blogger event, then I will. Otherwise, I'm done. I'm terrible at it. 6-handed SnG's? Maybe. But only with Parx.

I've (finally) realized that although I'm insanely jealous of other people's successes in that realm of the poker universe, and want to emulate it (granted, on a much smaller scale), I'm just not cut out for it. I have no patience for it, and I go on MASSIVE tilt when I'm a huge preflop/flop favorite and get drawn out on. I'm talking Bruce-Banner-into-the-Hulk-tilt.

I'm a cash game guy. It's who I am. Whether it's .10/.25 on Full Tilt, .05/.10 on Stars, or the $50 NL table at the Luxor, that's my game. Tourney's? Not so much.

Speaking of cash games...

Tonight, "TMav21" helped me start the bankroll-rebuilding process immensely. I took about $15 off of him in about 20 minutes. If you ever see TMavv21 on Stars, and are willing to drop a few levels, sit down and play with this guy.

I was a sad, sad pound puppy when he finally got fed up and left the table. I was unwinding from a long day and playing a little micro. After figuring this guy out for what he was (a calling station), I played this hand.

Crucify me if you must, but I knew I was good here:

PokerStars Game #7330611739:  Hold'em No Limit ($0.05/$0.10) - 2006/12/06 - 20:47:37 (ET)
Table 'Hyakutake II' 6-max Seat #4 is the button
Seat 1: condorandino ($21.10 in chips)
Seat 2: yepwingtim ($13.35 in chips)
Seat 3: Bloody P ($13.40 in chips)
Seat 4: TMavv21 ($27.30 in chips)
Seat 5: Funkert ($24.80 in chips)
Funkert: posts small blind $0.05
condorandino: posts big blind $0.10
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Bloody P [Qd As]
yepwingtim: folds
Bloody P: raises $0.30 to $0.40
TMavv21: calls $0.40
Funkert: folds
condorandino: folds
*** FLOP *** [4h 9d 9s]
Bloody P: bets $1
TMavv21: calls $1
*** TURN *** [4h 9d 9s] [8c]
Bloody P: bets $1.10
TMavv21: raises $1.10 to $2.20
Bloody P: calls $1.10
*** RIVER *** [4h 9d 9s 8c] [Jd]
Bloody P: checks
TMavv21: bets $1.20
Bloody P: calls $1.20
*** SHOW DOWN ***
TMavv21: shows [Ac 7s] (a pair of Nines)
Bloody P: shows [Qd As] (a pair of Nines - Ace+Queen kicker)
Bloody P collected $9.30 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $9.75 | Rake $0.45
Board [4h 9d 9s 8c Jd]
Seat 1: condorandino (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: yepwingtim folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 3: Bloody P showed [Qd As] and won ($9.30) with a pair of Nines
Seat 4: TMavv21 (button) showed [Ac 7s] and lost with a pair of Nines
Seat 5: Funkert (small blind) folded before Flop
Yeah, that extra dime on the bet after my check on the river was really going to push me off the pot...

To quote Willie Mays, "I had that one all the way."



Sunday, December 03, 2006

Gambling Blues

Hey Vikings, thanks for not being able to hold onto the fuggin' ball with a minute and a half left to at least kick a damn field goal and cover the spread for me. You had 9.5 points to keep. You kept the distance at 10. One half of a point could have won me $25.00.

I hate you. You're dead to me now. Oh, and Brad Childress, shave off that uber ghey porn star moustache before I come down to Winter Park and burn that shit off of your face. You run a tight ship, sure, but as a coach, you are T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E. Give me Tice back.

Dammit, I've had more junk kicking this weekend than I can remember in a long time. Sportsbooking, poker (big time), roshambo, hell, even my fantasy football team is getting their asses handed to them to the tune of 79-26 (for now).

I'm feeling Waffles-like right now.

Yes, I'm that angry.

I guess I just need to remind myself of this.

EDIT:
















So, it's not a TOTAL loss...

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Betting the Purple Nurple















Got an email from Bodog this morning letting me know that I still had $18 sitting in an account there. Two years ago, I did some sportsbooking with a buddy of mine, and did ok. When I listened to him, I won. When I didn't, I lost. He knew what he was doing, I...um...didn't. After the football season, I just forgot about the pittance laying there collecting dust, and vowed never to bet on a football game ever again.

That said, I have placed a wager on tomorrow's Vikings/Bears tilt (SKOL VIKINGS!). The spread is giving the Vikes 9.5 points. I may not be a football or math genius, but sweet baby jebus, that's almost 2 scores! And with Rex Grossmeoutman maintaining the helm of an anemic Bears offense, I like my chances for either a very close game, or an out-and-out win by my boys in purple and gold.

Wish me luck. If I win this bet, I'm downloading the Bodog poker client and taking it for a whirl.